I’m once again convinced that the sole purpose of my brother’s existence is to make my life a living hell.

It’s my Reading Week. My week off.

He decides to have the flu.

When he has a fever, he is a moaning baby. When the fever is under control, he is bouncing off the walls. I get absolutely no work done at home with him buggin me every 20 minutes.

I know he likes my company. I know he is getting very bored staying at home all week.

But what about me?

I get nothing out of this. I don’t get better grades, I don’t get paid, and I feel no emotional compensation either.

Oh and...I think I’ve got the bug from my brother. I’m drinking a ridiculous amount of fluids and taking all kinds of herbal remedies to ward it off.

My parents will only have themselves to blame when I refuse them any grandchildren in the future.

Yes, that is my current state.

And I can type. Wow.

I need to dance this off...except I'm home like the girl I'm supposed to be.

The world is spinning behind the back of my eyelids...weeeeh.

Maybe I should've given him a kiss on the lips.

Too late...

Maybe next time. If there is a next time.

For now, I need something to occupy my mind with so I won't fall asleep drunk. I would hate a hangover in the morning.

Com'on ppl be online...
talk to me!

This entry is spurred by the unhappy venting of many singles on various blogs after Singles Awareness Day. And just to clarify, I call it Singles Awareness Day because the unhappy moans of singles are overwhelming. I think the title is worthy and reflective of the truth.

May I advocate that singleness is not a sin, a disease or something to be ashamed of?

May I advocate that one can still be happy without that significant other? (How dare I eh?)

First I give you, The Generally Accepted Societal Perceptions:

Job = financial security, possession of worthy skills, busy, ambitious, self-contentment, happiness, leader, team player, punctuality

Joblessness = lack of skills, laziness, stupidity, not ambitious, inability to cope with the modern environment, inability to work with others

Singleness = unattractiveness, inability to interact with others, weirdo, shyness, laziness, hopeless, unhappiness

Marriage/Relationship = attractive, socially acceptable, self-confident, worthy, normal, happiness

Divorced = unfaithful, irresponsible, inability to keep a lover, unhappiness

Childlessness = barrenness, weirdo, selfishness, stupidity, unhappiness

I don’t think I’m being harsh.

Think about it, if a couple in their mid 30s have no children, the first thing that comes to mind would be: why the hell not and what’s wrong with them? This applies if a person is in his/her 30s and is single/unemployed. We ask: what is wrong with them? Something must be wrong with them otherwise they would be married with children and working right?

The opposite is true for those who are married with children and employed. We think: My! What picture perfect family life…they must be happy. All families have their faults and their hardships yet we judge by first impression.

Ever noticed on game shows like Jeopardy or Wheel of Fortune, when the contestants are introduced they’d say “I am an Accountant, married to my beautiful wife Sara. I have three heavenly children, Michael, Helen and Clara.” Do you ever recall any contestant saying “I am currently unemployed, recently divorced, and I’m fighting over the custody of my child.” Monetary gain is obviously more important to the person in the second case, but people in such situations are not the ones getting money because they are deemed by society as “shameful” and “unworthy”.
Why do you suppose so many youths are pushed to become doctors and lawyers? Doctors are held in very high regard not only because of the noble nature of the profession, but also because the title “Doctor” commands respect and reverence in our society. Doctors often say that their job is very rewarding. But honestly, how can performing digital rectal examinations for grumpy old men on a regular basis be rewarding? That’s not the rewarding part they are talking about. The work is hard but damn it, everyone will like you because you are a doc. Being a doctor is a “feel good” job…whereas, being a plumber is not.

The same thing applies being single or attached. If we meet someone who seems perfect in every way but single. We ask: what’s wrong? Something must be wrong.

If we are introduced to someone as an attached person, we think: oh, this means he/she must be a great person. Is that true? What about those who are in relationships for the sake of a relationship? What about those who are abused and used in a relationship but decides to stay. They get the same ego boost and recognition from society from their “attached status” but really, are they happy?

I believe that the essence of human existence is to achieve contentment and acceptance within the self.

We all compete with one another and the only thing we are doing is to assure ourselves of our worth. The reward of fitting in the societal mold of worthiness is obviously constant ego boosts.

I’ve come to accept and even embrace the fact that I don’t fit in the middle of the stupid bell curve.

I’m different, get over it.

I do not, for the life or death of me, believe in love in first sight or fate. I do, however, believe in a certain level of serendipity in the way of the world; especially when it comes to love. I don’t question why it is that I haven’t had a relationship yet. People ask me about this ALL THE TIME. Please get over the fact that it just never happened. Period! I accept it. There is nothing wrong with me or the world. I don’t have bad karma. I love myself just the way I am and I will never bitch (constantly that is…venting is permitted) about the current state of my life if there is something I can do to change it.

I do not feel that marriage and children are compulsory components of life. To me, my reproductive capability is simply one of numerous potentials I could fulfill. I’ve been told that I’ll make a wonderful mother and wife. So what? I will also make a fabulous lawyer, chef, or a stripper. Your point? Don’t tell me what to do. I make my own choices and everyone should respect them.

How can I be a happy single? Because I love me. The argument that "what's the point of achievements if you have no one to share it with?” doesn’t work with me. I answer boldly “I achieve because I want to and what I achieve I share with the world”.

And this I say to all the singles out there: learn to love yourself. You must be able to love yourself to love another. You must be able to stand on your own two feet and boldly face the world. With love in your heart, you won’t mind being single.

Waste it of course!

Check this out:

A story on Don't Date Him dot com

I've always wondered why people willingly let themselves be abused and used and then turn around and put the entire blame on their partner. Is this proof that love is blind?

If love is blind then all I have to do to be in love is take off my glasses.

Even Christa might even get a little freaked out!

Mac at least wasted a nice piece of paper telling me that I didn't make it in the application race for their Med School.

They told me to apply again.

You bet I will.

1. Seeing “Chinglish” in the Globe and Mail. Me so proud!

2. Seeing half naked black men dancing on stage.

3. Having lunch with Christa

4. Realising that missing my volunteer shift last week was a wise decision. I would've had to deal with 12 barfing 1st yr students from South Residence. Blood and gore is okay, vomit is not.

This past week have been dominated by this bloody paper.

I hate papers. My hand is cramping from the long hours of typing.

I can’t make good arguments for the life of me.

Actually, let me rephrase that: it takes way too long for me to pull anything decent out of my ass.

I’m skipping my volunteer shift to put in some much needed editing work. I feel so guilty for not going into the ER. But at the same time, I know this paper needs it. James kindly pointed out some very important things I need to improve on so I actually know what to edit.

Why is it that course work, the most important aspect of my life, is one that gets in the way of things I personally hold as more important? I don’t know when this paradox of values came into being but it’s driving me nuts!

On the other hand…I guess I’m guilty of poor time management. If I had handled things more efficiently then I would have made it to my shift today.

Just news...

I suppose a rejection email from U of Ottawa qualifies as bad news. That's right, they wouldn't even bother wasting a piece of paper for me. So a tree gets to live a bit longer...that makes me happy.

The reason: crappy grades!

I didn't make the cut off.

I think I'm taking this relatively well.

Cuz it's only my first rejection letter afterall.

At the College of Biological Science Career Night I had an hr long private chat with Anne Robinson, who got her MD from Western.

She got eight rejection letters before she got one acceptance letter.

I think I'm still good.